ok??????? I hope I am reading what you are saying correctly. I am not a dumb woman but that was very deep. I am not real sure what went in her childhood. I have met her parents and they seem nice, but you never know.

I guess I could look past all of this, if she would just "let go" of my husband and focus more on her children instead of reading things into what I do or say or just being a constant in our marriage. I have always been nice to her and I am sure I always will. The kids are the most important thing and I am here for them and not to make her happy. I finally came to that conclusion today and if just do what I can for them and stop worrying about her, I know I will be a more happier and stress free person. (it would help if she moved far away, though) LOL

Wow Sykray, that response was deep. I can't say I agree though. My ex treated my current wife the same way. She went though hell and back. I would bet a year's income that it was only to hurt my wife and I that she acted like she did.

Claudia, hang in there. Things will get better. I hope you are feeling better today. Drop me a message when you come online.

Ok...I thought of something today and want to get your input or anyone's input.

TE, how does your son feel about your current wife? I know you said that he hasnt seen his Mom in many years. I ask because I wonder how these boys here will feel about me in years to come. We already share a closeness and I feel like they love me, but it just worries me what they will think of me later in life. Being that there Mother and I are on very crappy terms...I dont want her to say anything negative about me to them to make them change there opinions or feelings about me. It worries me for I dont know how vindictive she can be.

Talk to you soon.

Very good question. My youngest son, who has lived with me except for a short period after the separation, has a good relationship with my wife. They bicker as any teenager and mother would do. Sometimes I feel like they are brother and sister. He calls her Mom and actually told her before we were married that he wished we would get married so he could call her Mom.

As for the older son, he does not like my wife. He stayed with his Mother and was filled full of negative things and he has never given her a chance. My ex told him that I left her for my current wife, which is a total lie. He believed her stories and probably still does today.

You have a much better chance of a good relationship with the kids because they are still young and they live with you. Just keep the channels of communication open and continue to treat them like they are your own and they will continue to love you.

My kids were 8 and 13 at the time. I only wish the older one could think for himself. Maybe one day the lightbulb will come on and he will see the truth.

Anyway, don't worry. You are in a good spot. Have a good day.

nine times out of ten,ex's are usually just nothing but trouble.they usually get bitter,especially if you move on with your life and don't stay miserable.how do I know this,I'm on my second marriage and my wife is on her third,after nearly 14 yrs we must be doin something right.
sure its not all been plain sailing,but i would go back to day one and re-live it all over again in a heart beat..

the key is,don't let the ex's come btwn you and your current partner.

Yes, that is the key. And for a while there, I just knew that is what she was trying to do. I still think that if given the chance she would try to cause us problems and worm her way back to his life. If only she knew how he really feels about her. He has finally seen her true colors. Thanks for the input!

You are right you have baggage that you knew he would bring into the marriage. He needs to be accountable and not ignore his baggage. The EX can be and will be a pain as long as he continues to think she will go away. He needs to make it right and you need to stop trying to do something you cannot control.